I got drunk again today because of a lot of things but my alcoholic/meth head brother is coming to stay with mom and I tonight... the one who owes me 3 grand? The one who is soooooo amazing because he works for a fake ass rehab center?
I'm drunk. For a lot of reasons. One because I wanna see if this mother fucker can catch someone who's not fucking stupid. Someone who has the IQ of over 120. Can you catch me, bro?
Tomorrow I have a trial shift at the coffee place; 10 am-2 pm. I'm nervous... so I'll zonk myself out like before because my brother will be here when I leave... I won't be able to grab a shot.
But drugs mannnn; I love it.
I came back to this city to figure out who I am... turns out that I'm the same goddamn girl I thought I was; that's kinda cool... kinda good news.
If I can handle this job it'll be ace; I'll get money. Get a car, get rid of debt... be able to be on my own; be able to buy booze on my own... go to AB on my own...
I wanna go to AB so fucking bad. There are so many jobs at the moment over there...
I hate living with/near my family. I feel so controlled, you know??
J has a three bedroom apartment... my eye is on it to be honest. I need escape; but I need a whole shit ton, you know?