Part 2.

Part 2:

The 16th of February was a goodish day!

The sun was out and my heart sung with summer vibes.

I texted my boring friend and asked if she wanted to go on an adventure.

She was like, "OMG, YES." so I gave her the option of either exploring trails around where we live, or  driving to the next town over to get ice cream. Obviously she chose the ice cream one hahaha which was what I was wanting to do anyway because I was craving a road trip, even if it was just an hour's drive.

I downloaded some good summer sounding songs, got an energy drink, picked her up, put my shades on, and droveeeee.

It was a fun drive for sure! Until I got pulled over for fucking speeding. I was doing 120 in a 90. But everyone else was going that fast too! I was just the last one so I was easy to catch :(

UGH. It was 200 bucks! And my first ticket! Worst thing ever. But at least I learnt that I didn't have a warrant out for my arrest for maybe hitting someone the day before hahaha

So I drove careful the rest of the day, which was LAMEEE, and BORINGGGGG.

Ice cream was amazing. We went to marble slab and I got peanut butter mixed with birthday cake, and it was like unlimited toppings day too SO I GOT LIKE EVERYTHING.

I GOT OREO AND GUMMY BEARS AND SKOR AND CAKE AND COOKIE DOUGH AND PROBZ SOME OTHER SHIT TOO. TOPPED WITH FUDGE.

FUCK YEAH.

When we got back to town we decided to explore the lakeside and take pictures and it was really nice and calming! But then we started to freeze our asses off so we went to this Mexican pub that serves avocado margaritas. Boring friend got one and I tried it and blech, too fucking creamy for me. I hate creamy things so much it's insane. I got the NORMAL margaritas because A) CLASS B) they were on special and I'm a broke ass fucking bitch 24 fucking 7.

Thennnn I think I dropped her off and that's that!

The 17th is harder to remember. It was Morgan's birthday!

Her, Dill, and I decided to go out for birthday drinks and lunch. Before that though I went out and bought her a bath bomb/EOS lip chap/moleskine as a present! I got a moleskine for Dill too because her birthday was like a week before and I missed it.

Anyway, we went out for drinks, and this other girl, J, comes too so now there's four of us. I have 2 double bellinis (special again) and then we go to J's house because these girls wanna blaze lol

I decide to pick up some alcohol first because I'd rather drink than get super fucking anxious again.

I drink half a 2/6, they get high, we talk for a good two hours. It was good! It was fun!

I drove Dill and Morgan home and I'm just so happy and bursting with love for my friends. I give Morgan a big hug before she leaves and yeah, I was just so happy.

I had plans with the boring friend after so I drove to her place singing all the way, so happy, so infinite feeling.

I get to her place, and she's watching the bachelor, so we watch it and talk when suddenly she points to my arm, "What's that?" she asks.

I look, knowing exactly what she's seeing. A couple nights before I was feeling really low, and my arm was the victim. I figured if I cut in just one place, if I do short cuts, that it'd be easier to hide. I ended up cutting a small square shape in every direction possible just where my arm bends. That's a really good spot because if it scars it looks less noticeable because of the bend and crease already present.

Anyway, I look down at the band-aid and laugh, "I don't knowwwww"

There's no point in making something up. She knows and I don't even care. I'm fucking wasted and when you're wasted why would you care?

"You cut yourself?"

"Yeah, but it's much better now. I barely do it."

"Why do it at all?"

People who have never cut themselves will never understand why someone would do it. I didn't even get it until I did it.

And no matter how much you explain it to them, their understanding never progresses.

We circle back and forth a bit with, "What about alternatives?"

When you're at that point, you don't care about "alternatives"

"Why don't you try to stop?"

Because it fucking works you idiot. It helps, plus I barely fucking do it anymore.

"Why did you start?"

Omggggg long fucking storyyyy

So I get into the depression and ED and everything, "What about medication?"

OMG CAN WE JUST STOPPPPP.

She eventually feels like it's getting too heavy and says we should go get starbucks and I totally agree so we do.

We drive around singing songs for like an hour, go back to her place, finish watching the bachelor, and then I go home!

END OF PART TWO.

Part three is what you're really waiting to read and you don't even know it yet! Be patient! Tomorrow is'a comin'!

- Mint.