It was raining and I was sad. It stopped raining and I was still sad.

Yesterday was terrible.

Roomie is moving out and it just feels like everyone's leaving because everyone is leaving.

Either going home for the summer, or travelling, or because they don't need me.

I'm so alone and it's a gross feeling.

Yesterday I got really drunk and real sad and I cried a whole bunch and I really needed a hug but I had no one to hug.

I went to T's house because I really wanted to return his book because I felt like I had it for far too long and also after returning it, I'd have no reason to see him again which would be awesome.

I went there and I was still kinda crying and I returned his goddamn book and he was like, "Are you drunk?"

I laughed, "I'm always drunk." I said emotionlessly, then turned and started going back towards my car.

"You shouldn't be driving!" He yelled back at me.

"I'M FINEEEE" I yelled back.

I drove back home and went back to my room and cried until I passed out.

I hate people. I hate how I need them.

And I hate anxiety and how it's ruining my life.

And I hate my life. And I hate myself for not having enough courage to end it.

I hate how sometimes I think I'm worth enough to make it better.

I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself

More than anything or anyone.

And it's funny because that's all I have.

- Mint.