Alive with the glory of love.

Yesterday was better.

Today is better too.

I think I just had to go outside. Get out of my head, even though there was nothing even there. It's not like my mind was racing or anything, but it was cold in there, and foggy, and dark. And I think that's depressing. So work was good, because I got out.

I didn't quit obviously (I never seem to quit when I originally want to quit, it's getting tiring and predictable) but work was hella boring. I was half an hour early for each of my breaks which was so annoying and boring. Because, there's stuff to do once you come back from break of course, but you have to do it at a certain time, you know? Like, for example, I can't bag the buns that are in the bun case until 7 because what if there are still customers wanting buns?

It's sort of funny really, because I was so nervous that I'd be behind, and that I'd never finish, or I'd forget something.

But I didn't. I was early, finished everything, remembered everything, I'm fucking amazing. But this is a problem. It's my fourth shift, my first non-training shift, and I'm already bored. I already have everything down, there's no challenges. So I need another job. Quickly.

I was going to go to that downtown bakery again today, try to see if I could make it inside this time, but I think I'm going to chicken out again. It takes a lot of courage to go in, bother someone who's working to say, "Hey! I'm that girl who was supposed to come in for an interview but never showed! I'm back two weeks later, wanna hire me!? :D " So maybe I'll just let it be.

I wish I could do things by myself… I wish I could get over it. I know avoiding these things doesn't help, but it's too scary to face.

On a lighter note, I'm reading Oscar Wilde's, The Picture of Dorian Gray and holy shit it's fantastic. Apparently it's Wilde's only novel, but I have his complete collection of other work to go through later and if it's anything like this book, it'll all be fabulous.

I'm only on chapter three, but every second line is something that makes you think, it makes you want to quote. I'll probably go through the book once more after I'm done and highlight all the thoughts I want to remember on a whim. Even the preface is amazing. I love it, and I love Lord Henry. He's so cheeky and all, making people think and question. I love it. B, I hope you like it too, I'll send it to you once I've finished, or maybe once I've gone through it again with the highlighter? I don't know, what do you think?

P.s! Have you finished The Catcher in the Rye yet!? Did you like it?? Omg I still love it. I still want Holden's hat really bad.

I think that's everything I have to say for now! Hopefully my sun keeps this shine up!

- Mint